Fifty Shades Freed--Chapter Sixteen (Part I)In which absolutely no one listens to Ana’s bodyguard, Prescott; Leila, the Broken Bird Ex, comes to Ana’s office to chat; Ana discovers the existence of an informal support group; Ket and I discuss the sheer impossibility of the beginning of Leila’s plot arc, and Grey threatens and emotionally bullies ( Read more... )

Chapter 7 (Part II)In which Ana goes back to the job she was handed after working for a week and a half; Grey "gives" Ana something that he doesn't own; and Grey storms over to Ana's office, enraged by a very minor issue that they should have discussed BEFORE they got married ( Read more... )

Fifty Shades Freed--Chapter Five (Part I)In which Ana panics for no good reason; Grey imitates Edward Cullen at his creepiest; Ana recalls a honeymoon in which she was either in tears or terrified of angering her husband as "blissful"; Grey gives Ana a completely unnecessary Jet Ski lesson; Grey threatens the the incorrect person with mutilation; ( Read more... )

Fifty Shades Freed--Chapter Four (Part III)In which we see the most clichéd love scene in the history of the world; Grey makes a statement filled with plotholes, leading Ana to jump to a ludicrous conclusion; Versailles is dragged into this book and is dissed by Grey; the timeline turns into a Möbius strip; and Ana's Symbolic Dream symbolizes the ( Read more... )

Fifty Shades Freed--Chapter Two (Part I)

In which Grey catches Ana being topless on a topless beach and shames her for this, Ana blames herself for Grey's tantrum, Grey delivers a patronizing lecture, and Ana experiences a detailed flashback to Grey howling about the mere concept of a pre-nuptial agreement.